Mostly for amusement purposes...
In the hallway i heard him call, sarah, your phone's makin noises!
I ran to the phone and heard it beeping. it was the beep that told me an anynomous person was calling me. the calls i dreaded.
I picked up the phone and said hello.
Sarah?
He didn't need to say anymore. he didn't need to say his name. i knew the voice...i've heard it a thousand times over the past 3 years...even after the time separating us...i still knew it.
f called friday night. he thought he saw mike down where he lived. but he didn't cause mike was by my side all night, all day.
i'd like to say i missed him. i'd like to say i wish i had said more or asked him to talk to me longer. i but i didn't. i didn't want to. i got off as quickly as i could....said only the necessary words. the only thing i wish i had said would have been, can i have my clothes back...please!!
i'd also like to say that my feelings came rushing back and i felt the need for him....but i didn't. I DIDN'T.
I will admit...as soon as i said good bye...i put the phone on the table....looked up into mike's eyes...told him who called, what happened....and sat in the middle of the kitchen, with my head in my hands. Mike started talking on the phone...which made me go to mine and text someone who i knew could support me... but as soon as he got off, he did everything to get me up. He didn't understand why i reacted like that.
Honest to God, I don't know why either.
I just sat there....my mind blank...my heart empty. I guess it was weird to feel nothing for someone i felt so much for. I guess i wanted to hate him....but in an odd way...i didn't. he voice scared me. i didn't want him coming to my home and seeing me and making me loose it even more. but the call happened, ended, and that was it.
he held me...not understanding...but kept holding me, kissing me....looking deep into my empty eyes....holding me....his arms telling me thats HE is the one who is here holding me, loving me, caring for me....the one who will never do what was done to me again.
And you know what? I thank F for that call. You reassured me that I am, in fact, over you. And that feeling is hella good :-D
And by the way, Happy Valentines Day...especially to D
I ran to the phone and heard it beeping. it was the beep that told me an anynomous person was calling me. the calls i dreaded.
I picked up the phone and said hello.
Sarah?
He didn't need to say anymore. he didn't need to say his name. i knew the voice...i've heard it a thousand times over the past 3 years...even after the time separating us...i still knew it.
f called friday night. he thought he saw mike down where he lived. but he didn't cause mike was by my side all night, all day.
i'd like to say i missed him. i'd like to say i wish i had said more or asked him to talk to me longer. i but i didn't. i didn't want to. i got off as quickly as i could....said only the necessary words. the only thing i wish i had said would have been, can i have my clothes back...please!!
i'd also like to say that my feelings came rushing back and i felt the need for him....but i didn't. I DIDN'T.
I will admit...as soon as i said good bye...i put the phone on the table....looked up into mike's eyes...told him who called, what happened....and sat in the middle of the kitchen, with my head in my hands. Mike started talking on the phone...which made me go to mine and text someone who i knew could support me... but as soon as he got off, he did everything to get me up. He didn't understand why i reacted like that.
Honest to God, I don't know why either.
I just sat there....my mind blank...my heart empty. I guess it was weird to feel nothing for someone i felt so much for. I guess i wanted to hate him....but in an odd way...i didn't. he voice scared me. i didn't want him coming to my home and seeing me and making me loose it even more. but the call happened, ended, and that was it.
he held me...not understanding...but kept holding me, kissing me....looking deep into my empty eyes....holding me....his arms telling me thats HE is the one who is here holding me, loving me, caring for me....the one who will never do what was done to me again.
And you know what? I thank F for that call. You reassured me that I am, in fact, over you. And that feeling is hella good :-D
And by the way, Happy Valentines Day...especially to D
