waiting

ever feel like everything you've ever wanted slipped out of your hands. everything you've ever needed gone in just a second. the love, security, kindness and support you got for so long slipped out of your hands into someone else's.

i'm defeated, beat and worn. you slipped away and now i'm stuck here staring at my empty hands wondering where the hell i went wrong. he's everything you hated in me. he's everything you wanted me to change about myself. and i can see why. my hearts on the ground in a million pieces, i wonder if you will ever pick up and help me repair it. i wonder if you even know....that i'm sitting here thinking of you. as always.

i can't help it though. cuz he's just everywhere. still.

its been too long...cuz the only thing i could possibly think of writing about these days is this one person who consumes me...and shouldn't be...and i don't know what to do about it.

there's nothing i can do.

its too hard to just move on...its easier said than done..